The Inevitable Meltdown
The key to avoiding a meltdown is keeping as close to your child’s routine as possible. Even if it puts a damper on family fun, Tabas makes sure that Chet has a nap each day, and that he gets dinner and to bed on time, or as close as possible. In the morning, she travels with packets of instant oatmeal so she can give Chet his medication first thing, without having to get him presentable to eat breakfast outside of their room.
But, sometimes, it’s best just to grin and bear it. Mary Stoneroad’s son D.J. is autistic and loves the Hersheypark amusement park in Hershey, Penn. The worst part about their visits is leaving. When D.J. was little, Stoneroad brought a red wagon and could quickly wheel D.J. out of the park. But, now that he’s bigger, at age 7, she’s had to get creative. Sometimes Stoneroad finds that the usual methods—showing D.J. pictures of home—don’t work. That’s when, “we do the army move,” she says. “We usually have one person stand on either side, and cup our hands on his elbows to get him walking until we’re out.” That creates a bit of a scene, but Stoneroad isn’t concerned with what other people think. People have usually figured out that there’s something different about D.J., and are accommodating. “We haven’t had anybody say anything nasty to us,” she says.
Accessible Planning Tips
- Plan for success. Look ahead and prepare for possible trouble spots. Think about foods to pack, medicines to bring, doctors notes to have handy, etc.
- Booking a hotel. Talk to manager, sales or marketing department to explain your family’s special needs and to get an idea of the room layout.
- Consider bringing a wheelchair. Even if your child can walk just fine, he may tire easily when traveling.
- Engage gawking children. Invite others to learn about your child's disability; they’ll be more understanding and less likely to make a scene.
- Adhere to a strict, daily routine. Plan out bed, nap and eating times.
- Take it easy when dining out. Pick a corner table for extra privacy, and choose tried-and-tested restaurants with foods you know your child can eat.
Dining Out
Restaurants present a handful of challenges, mazes of tables and chairs, and potentially embarrassing public displays. And then, there’s the food. The only concern for Lewin when she travels with Christian, 8, who’s a slow and unsteady walker, is helping him navigate through those unfamiliar and tightly spaced tables and chairs. She walks beside Christian, and “I make myself as wide as I can,” she says, without being too obvious. “I don’t want people to notice the disability, but I want people to give him a little extra room.”
Tabas makes sure to get a table in the corner when she takes Chet to restaurants. Feeding him can get messy, so a corner table doesn’t disturb other diners and gives Tabas enough room. When Schwab travels, she brings a food processer to purée foods for her son. And, while on the road, they stop at restaurants they know will have foods Patrick can eat: spaghetti or mac and cheese. “We make a lot of concessions on where we eat when we’re on the road,” she says. “But, I don’t want to take the opportunity away from him to eat with his family.”
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